But I Want What You Have- the Compassion Quandary
MS, TN & chronic migraines cause me a wide variety of symptoms. Like, I could be here all day listing them. Among my symptoms are: numbness, tingling, facial pain, muscle spasms, limb weakness, dizziness and fainting. This is every day. As in multiple parts of my body can have all kinds of chaos going on, all at once, even.
Try explaining this to someone who is either committed to misunderstanding you, or clueless about how important good health is – you know, the people who take it for granted because they’ve never had anything other than stellar health, or the people who think they’re already at rock bottom because they have the flu, or, gasp, a headache for two whole hours! Something temporary.
We can’t explain it to these people. Remember that people are only capable of understanding within their own ranges of experience. For some people,Remember that people are only capable of understanding within their own ranges of experience. Click To Tweet it’s more, way more, limited than others. It’s frustrating, though.
There’s a new coworker at my job. She’s questioning everything about me – my limited hours and doctor mandated frequent breaks, and being quite vocal with her questions and not getting any answers. I don’t owe anyone an explanation, but it seems to anger her that she isn’t getting her answers.
This weekend, this coworker walked around with a band-aid on her finger repeatedly poking it at me and telling me she was handicapped. I admittedly lost my cool a bit then, but it was after hours of it and years of harassment with that job, and at least I was quiet about it. I only looked at her and said one word. Really.
There have been many times I’ve been tempted to remove that stressor from my life. I’m not a tree, I’m free to move on. I’m also not a quitter, and I need to work as disability has yet to work out for me. The thought of trying to find a less insane job is too much to handle, but maybe I should make that leap.
I’d wanted to make this article a list type thing. You know, something along the lines of How To Not Struggle With Compassion When You’re Chronically Ill, but it just didn’t work out. I don’t have any advice. I hope you all have some for me. I understand that everyone's pain is real. Click To Tweet That pain isn’t a competition.
Working in a world where I’m trying so hard through pain that’s never ending to have compassion for others who seem to have little for me hurts me beyond belief. What do I do?
Ellie is a 45-year-old woman living in South Carolina. She works as a cashier, but is always dreaming of more, she’s just not sure of what more is. Her favorite hobbies are reading, writing and yarn crafts. Her biggest hope in blogging is to help no one ever feel alone in their journeys with chronic illness, or anything else.